


Changing into Myself

by Uniasus



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Self-Discovery, Self-Identity, Teenage girls are Jack's best friend, Transgender, looking pretty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-07
Updated: 2015-01-07
Packaged: 2018-03-06 12:32:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3134627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uniasus/pseuds/Uniasus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Pippa started a new job at Macy's, she did not expect to run into Jack Frost in the dressing room after hours. Especially not in the Junior's department.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Changing into Myself

**Author's Note:**

> **Where this came from, pt 1:** A tumblr posted comic titled [Suit and Tie](http://chickahdee.tumblr.com/post/95365368274) that popped on my dashboard once, stayed with me, popped up again, and got the bunnies hopping. Which resulted in an odd [drunk text thread with my sis](http://uniasus.tumblr.com/post/105341640398/drunk-plotbunny-text-that-im-tagging-for-easy). I have to admit, this is essentially sophisticated crack, though some of the issues are real and deep for people.

Jack's biggest problem of his immortal life was that he was invisible. Or at least, it used to be. Then he got kidnapped by Santa Claus, defeated Pitch Black, and swore an oath to protect the children of Earth. Because, well, they could see him now. Jack Frost was no longer invisible to children.

Goal achieved, he now had time to think about...other things. Mull over his memories, play with kids who actually aimed snowballs at him, explore the turrets of the Tooth Palace (because Bunny always kicked him out when he tried to explore the Warren.)

Being seen now allowed him to act on thoughts that had been overshadowed by loneliness, which is what led to a new habit of sneaking into department stores. He kept his habit a secret, because if anyone found out Jack knew there'd be questions. Questions he wasn't sure he could answer because Jack couldn't really even explain it to himself why he was doing what he was. He just...did. 

But of course, secrets don't stay secret forever, and if you had helped defeat the Boogieman you don't forget your childhood myths and heroes easily. Which is why sixteen-year-old Pippa Biddle froze when she entered the women's changing room at Macy's and saw Jack.

"What are you doing here?" They shouted at the same time.

Pippa crossed her arms over her chest. "I just started working here last week, and was told to search the fitting rooms for garments left inside and put them back on the racks."

"I...I just wanted to try on some clothes." Jack blushed as he twisted his hands together. 

"I can see that. But is there a reason why you're wearing that?"

Jack gave a quick side glance into the three-way mirror he stood in front of. He honestly couldn't think of a solid reason that he felt Pippa would accept. Not knowing what else to say, the truth slipped past his lips. "I thought the dress was pretty."

"I should hope it's a pretty dress, it's 400 dollars." She smiled at him. "How often do you do this? Sneak in and wear dresses?"

Jack shrugged. "Every once in a while, though not always here. I switch stores. You're...okay with me wearing girls' clothes?"

"Jack, I like you. You're my friend. And if you want to wear dresses and skirts, I won't stop you."

"You don't think it's strange?"

"Just...unexpected. You forget my best friend is Cupcake and she always wears the most outrageous things. She showed up at school today wearing one of her mom's shirts from the 80s and a poodle skirt."

Jack smiled at the humor in Pippa's voice, not quite able to picture Cupcake's outfit.

"What else do you do? Put on makeup, play with your hair?" Pippa tugged at Jack's fringe.

Jack brought a hand up to his hair. "I can't really do much with this. I tried willing it to grow, but it didn't. Spirits are unchanging, unless our myth changes too."

"Hmmm. Still, let's try okay? I need you to change back into your old clothes so I can clean up here, but tomorrow night, say eightish, come over and we'll go through my closet. We'll see what suits you best and find something you could fly around in. I don't think that dress would work, even if it is gorgeous."

"Really?" Jack beamed at her.

"Really. And I'll get Cupcake to come. She's not really into makeup and that stuff, but her mom's a beautician. She's picked up some things."

Jack wrapped Pippa in a hug. "Thanks. I'm looking forward to it." 

She gently pushed him off. "Now change. Go into that last stall and I'll work from the other end."

Grinning, he did as he was told.

* * *

The next night, Jack hovered outside the window to peek in before knocking. Pippa wasn't in her bedroom, but Cupcake seemed to be plugging something into an outlet underneath Pippa's desk. A desk which Jack was used to seeing covered in books and papers, but had been turned into a nail salon. There were a dozen little bottles of color along the far edge and a chair on either side. 

Pippa walked in and saw Jack floating on the other side of the glass. "Jack! Why didn't you knock?" She opened the window and he flew in. 

"I was about to."

"Jack! Hi!" Cupcake grinned in greeting as she stood up and Jack waved at her. "Pippa said you wanted a makeover."

"I'm not entirely sure if I want to go that far."

"Well, you just tell us what you want and we'll do that. How's that sound?"

"Okay."

"Come on." Pippa pulled on Jack's sleeve. "You're my size so let's see if you like anything in my closet."

Jack set his staff leaning against the outside wall and followed her. Pippa threw open the doors and gestured to the items inside like a model showing off game show prizes.

"Pretend it's Macy's. Pick out anything you like, and then you can change over there." She pointed to the near corner where she had taped a sheet to the ceiling. "Normally, I wouldn't mind if my friends changed in front of me but we didn't know what you would be comfortable with so we made you a changing room."

"Wow. Thanks, Pippa." He spent a moment looking at her closet. Dresses on the left transitioning to skirts, then pants, then shirts. Jack didn't know where to start.

"What about that top you bought last week?" Cupcake asked.

"Oh yeah!" Pippa went straight to the right end and pulled out a silver sequined top. 

Jack wrinkled his nose. "I don't like sequins. They itch."

Pippa shrugged and tossed it one the bed. "Then pick something else. Let's find an outfit you like, and then we'll do your nails and face and hair."

"Okay." Jack found himself excited by the prospect and dived in. 

What followed was a half hour of Jack trying one thing on after another and showing off to Pippa and Cupcake. He didn't fit in her pants very well, or some of her tighter skirts, but he fell in love with a knee length white ruffle skirt. 

"I don't know Jack, I don't think you look good in white with your skin color." Pippa frowned staring at his legs. 

"But it totally suits him! I had no idea your calves were so nice Jack." 

He flushed at Cupcake's compliment, looking down his back to his calves in Pippa's mirror. He always liked his legs and it was nice to know other people thought they were nice too. 

Cupcake nodded. "I say keep it on. You need a pretty top with that."

He said no to all of Pippa's button down tops but eventually settled on a forest green top with a square neckline. 

"Perfect!" Pippa clapped her hands and pushed Jack into the chair in front of the desk.

"Put your feet in the bucket," Cupcake demanded. The water in it wasn't too warm, thankfully. 

"Now," Cupcake sat in the chair across from him, "give me your hands."

Pippa attacked his hair with a comb while Cupcake cut and filed his nails before painting them with the gold sparkles she noticed Jack had been eyeing. When Cupcake switched to doing his feet, he was very glad he washed them regularly and walked in sand to keep them smooth. 

Pippa pulled out a make-up bag. "This is moisturizer, it keeps your skin healthy and young."

"My skin will always be healthy and young," Jack joked.

She ignored him and kept explaining what she was doing. "Foundation, to even out your skin. Blush, to give you color. This will make your brows more defined. Use eyeliner and then mascara to make your eyes pop. I like to have eyeshadow that matches my clothes, so I'm using this light green on you."

Cupcake made an executive decision and painted his toes a pastel pink, throwing in side comments to Pippa's commentary. "You're really fair Jack, so if you want to go for a more natural look go very light on the blush. On the other hand, bright, dynamic colors for the eyes and lips is in style right now and with your pale skin, I think you could pull that off really well. Things to think about."

He took everything they said to mull over later, but that all left him when Pippa pulled him up and had him stand in front of the mirror. 

Jack had already seen the clothes on himself, but now with his hair smoothly falling on either side of a part and a bit of color on his face, he didn't recognize himself. He had to touch his face to make sure that yes, it was really him in the mirror. 

"What do you think?" Pippa asked from behind him.

"I wish I could look like this all the time."

Cupcake and Pippa grinned first at each other, then him in the mirror. 

"Glad you like it," Cupcake said. "But why can't you look like this all the time? You're really pretty."

He blushed and dropped his eyes to his freshly painted toenails. 

"I don't know if kids would recognize me if I was like this. And I don't know what the Guardians would think."

"I'm sure they'd understand," Cupcake began but Jack shook his head. 

"I'm not sure they would."

"That's okay." Pippa came up beside him and looped her arm through his. "You can do minor things. Take a couple bottles of nail polish. One of my mascara tubes. I have an extra comb too."

"Thanks Pippa. You too, Cupcake, for doing this for me."

"We're friends, of course we'd help you look nice. Now, both of you look over here." Cupcake pressed a button on Pippa's phone with a click. Pippa skipped over to look at the photo and Jack followed more sedately. 

"Look at that Jack, we look amazing together." Pippa took her phone back, pressed a couple buttons, and then looked up to grin at him. "I just sent it to Walgreen’s. Come by tomorrow about dinner time and I'll have a print out of it for you. Just because you can't look like this every day doesn't mean you should forget it."

"I'll be here."

* * *

At the next Guardian meeting, Tooth caught his hands and stared at his nails. "Did Sophie convince you to let her paint your nails?"

Jack blushed. Sophie hadn't done anything, Jack had tried painting them himself. He hadn't done a good job, there was paint on his cuticles and he didn't have an even coat like Cupcake had given him. In fact, he hadn't realized till this morning that he missed the left edge of his left ring finger.

But he didn't feel comfortable about admitting that. 

"Yeah, Sophie insisted."

"And she did your toes too?"

"Uh, yeah." It had actually been Cupcake again, she had done his toes while he did his fingers. They were a sunshine yellow, opposed to the lilac his fingers were.

"I like it."

"Really?"

"Yes. And your nails are so shaped. Perfect nails and teeth? You're a dream come true, Jack."

* * *

When Jack showed up for their monthly makeover appointment in November, Cupcake surprised them with a large bag of Halloween costumes. 

"I went November 1st, I figured they'd be fun to try on." 

Jack flipped through them: nurse, queen, pirate, a couple superheroes, a mummy. There were also accessories: fairy wings, wigs, masks, and hats. He had never had a desire to dress up for Halloween, though he had always enjoyed watching the kids dress up and run from house to house for candy. Tonight, he couldn't wait to open a bag and try a costume on.

He told Pippa and Cupcake about Tooth liking his painted nails. They put on mini skits as they traded costumes. And in a show of juvenile delinquency, they put on rubber masks, knocked on Jamie's door while he was babysitting Sophie, and scared him by jumping in front of the open door and roaring. 

Dressed in a Wonder Woman costume, Jamie had no idea Jack was the third member of the trio. Or if he did, he didn't comment on Jack's choice of clothing. That, dressed as a female in the company of a male and not hearing anything negative, had Jack thinking maybe tonight was a good time to do something he had been debating about since Cupcake and Pippa had first made him look like a girl.

"Can I have the tavern wench costume?"

"Sure." Pippa tossed it at him and Jack went behind the hanging sheet to change. He put his hide pants back on, but instead of donning his sweatshirt he put on the billowy navy top and the fake corset from the costume. 

"Do you think it would be okay if I take this?" he asked, stepping back into the room. Both girls looked at him.

"Like, to keep?" Cupcake asked. "Of course!"

"Thanks. Do you think I could keep one of the wigs too?"

"You liked the long hair, huh?" Pippa said knowingly.

"Yeah. I always liked braiding my sister's hair and wanted to do my own too."

"I'll do one better," Cupcake announced. "I'll ask my mom to show me how to put in an extension. It'll look much better than one of these cheap wigs. Come to my house next weekend."

* * *

Jack stroked the hair spilling over his shoulder. It felt real, and while not exactly the same color of his hair it was close enough from across the room. 

"Cupcake, this is incredible!"

She grinned at him from over his head in the mirror. "I'm glad you like it."

"It won't fall out? I don't have to worry about losing it as I'm flying or anything?"

"The only thing you have to worry about is it getting caught in tree branches."

 _And the Guardians,_ he wanted to say but didn't. Pippa and Cupcake had already told him multiple times that his fellow spirits would accept this side of him, but Jack still wasn't sure. Tooth might have been okay with his painted nails, but hair down to his waist was another thing entirely. 

"It comes off easily, right?" He asked and as an answer Cupcake gave a little jerk on the hair piece. It separated from his scalp taking only a few hairs.

"Easy removal."

"Perfect."

* * *

It had been a good Tuesday afternoon. It might have been too early for snow in Michigan, but with his command of the wind he played a game of making leaf piles and leaf devils with a bunch of kindergarteners. And he had to admit, he loved the look of wind wrinkles in his new shirt. And the feel of long hair streaming behind him.

These kids were believers, obviously, because they laughed at his face. They knew who Jack Frost was, and so Jack assumed they knew the boy who spent the day playing with them was Jack Frost. But when moms started gathering kids up to leave the park, the gaggle of kids called him 'miss'.

"Miss, please come back and play with us!"

"Miss, can you make the leaves dance one more time?"

"Miss, you're so pretty! I want to l look like you when I'm older."

He had been mistaken for a girl. Jack didn't really know what to say in his confusion - should he correct them? Go with the flow? Before he could make up his mind the kids were gone, tagging along after parents and sitters leaving Jack standing there frowning.

Did he mind being seen by people who believed in Jack Frost, but didn't recognize him as such? Being mistaken for a girl?

No. He didn't.

* * *

Jack perched on the top of North's roof and yanked on his hair. The extension came free and he lamented the loss of it. He liked having the extra weight on his head, feeling the strands on the back of his neck and pressing against his spine through the new, thinner shirt.

He wasn't however ready for anything the Guardians might say. The new shirt was bound to get some comments, it was too feminine not to, especially with the fake corset. He didn't need to add long hair into the mix. His relationship with the Guardians was too new, too entrenched in bad first impressions, that Jack wasn't willing to open up to them yet. 

Jack was scared that this, whatever he was going through where dressing like a girl made him feel happy and normal, would prevent him from becoming better friends with the Guardians. He didn't want to risk that.

Better take the corset off too.

He placed it next to the wig on the roof, covered them in snow, and then jumped down to a balcony to enter from the glass doors there. Everyone but Sandy stopped chatting to greet Jack. And then question what he was wearing.

"What happened to your sweatshirt, mate?"

"Ah, you know. I had to go trick-or-treating with the kids, we dressed up, and I felt like it was time for a change and kept the shirt."

Tooth flitted around Jack, pulling at the loose fabric while he continued his conversation with Bunny.

"Yeah, what'd you go as?"

"Can't you tell?" Jack stepped back and opened his arm, careful to keep his painted nails pointed towards the back wall. 

Tooth grabbed on of his hands, looked at the nails, but then flew over to Bunny's side. Jack stared at her in confusion, but Bunny caught his attention by guessing, lamely, a Pilgrim.

Jack huffed and put his hand on his hips, jutting the left one out. "A pirate. I was a pirate. They wear billowy tops."

"And eye patches and shoes."

"And so did I. On Halloween. I only kept the shirt."

"You actually wore shoes?"

Jack's answer was interrupted by Sandy's arrival. 

While North greeted Sandy, Tooth pulled Jack aside.

"Is there something you're not telling us?"

"What? No. What makes you say that?"

"Your nails are painted again. And your lips are pinker than normal."

Jack immediately pressed his lips together and squeezed his hands into fists. He no longer had a pocket to hide his hands in and he had forgotten to wipe off the lip gloss he liked wearing. 

"I sucked on an icicle on my way here, that always makes my lips pinker."

Tooth frowned. "Jack, we're your friends. Don't hide things from us. Something's different, I know it is, and I just want to make sure you're all right."

"Thanks, Tooth, really, but I'm okay. Nothing's different. I'm just normal Jack Frost."

She frowned, even her head crest wilting, but North came over to wrap Jack in a bear hug and the meeting began. There wasn't anything new to report, just Jack and North getting busier as the winter season was approaching. 

Unlike usual, Jack took off as soon as the business side of things were taken care. Tooth watched him go with sad eyes. Jack hoped she didn't bring up her concerns with the others after he left, but he had to get out of there. Tooth wasn't ready to hear he liked being a girl. Jack wasn't ready to say it. He gathered his stuff and flew away. He didn't put the corset and hair extensions back on until he crossed into Canada.

* * *

Jack looked at the extension in his hand. He had tried to clean and untangle it himself, but there was no use; he needed Pippa's comb. With a sigh, he left Hanover and headed towards Burgess. 

Pippa was getting into bed by the time he arrived, but she eagerly opened the window to let him in.

"Jack! I wasn't expecting to see you for two weeks yet."

"Yeah, well," he held up the hair. "Can I borrow a comb? I can go to the pond to untangle it, you don't have to stay up."

"No, no, let's chat."

So Jack told her about being mistaken for a girl, multiple times now, and liking it. He liked feeling pretty, liked the way he strangely felt more comfortable and confident dressed as a female. Aside from Guardian meetings. Pippa repeated what she had said before - Jack really should tell them about his new hobby.

"They're not going to stop liking you," Pippa said, braiding the newly cleaned and attached hair extension. 

"You can't prove that."

"Only North's entirely human, the rest of them are all rather odd and that hasn't stopped them from being friends, has it? What's weirder, a boy who likes wearing makeup or a man made from sand?'

"Sandy, probably."

"So what's really the issue, Jack? I feel like you're just using the Guardians as an excuse now."

Jack frowned. "It's a real concern, Pippa."

"Sorry, sorry. But, is there maybe another reason you haven't told anyone else? Not even Jamie and the other boys?"

He didn't have a good reason for not telling the male half of the Burgess Brigade anything. They knew the true him, who he was at the heart, and all the kids here in Burgess knew him better than anyone else. Maybe even better than the Guardians. But now that he thought about it, he hadn't seen Jamie for the past few months. He had wanted to hide his girly habits. 

"I guess, telling other people makes it more real. It's no longer dress up."

"And that's a problem?"

"Well, it's not normal. You're born one way and you're supposed to stay like that. If not, you're punished by God and sent to Hell."

Pippa paused in her braiding. "I forgot you grew up the in the 1700s and just how different people lived and were raised then. I've got some books you might like, I picked them up from the library with you in mind anyway."

She finished the braid, tied it off, and stood to walk over to her bookshelf. Jack followed, swinging the braid over his shoulder.

The stack of books she dumped in his hands was bigger than he expected. Jack did not expect there to be one book on the subject of switching genders. Let alone seven, though most were thin. 

The titles on the spine meant nothing, but Jack trusted Pippa's book picking skills. 

"These are all about boys who felt like girls, well, one's about a girl who felt like a boy. This isn't something people are punished for Jack. This is something that's normal for some people."

"Really?"

"Really. Read them, and you'll see."

"Okay. Thanks, Pippa."

"No problem. And think about telling Jaime and the others."

"I will. Thanks again." He flew out the window, leaving Pippa to get some sleep.

* * *

The books were interesting. At the very least, they helped him understand he wasn't alone in these feelings. Others had gone through a similar process. There was even a name for it - gender dissociation. Jack wasn't sure he wanted people to call him 'she' yet, or ever, but just because he dressed up in girl clothes and wore makeup didn't make him a girl. He was just...a boy who dressed like a girl and liked passing for one.

Maybe. He was still figuring things out.

Jack had been thinking about what Pippa had said, and so three nights later Jack perched on Jamie's windowsill and knocked on the glass.

The brunette looked up where he sat on the floor folding clothes and just stared at Jack. He didn't get up to open the window and Jack did his best to hide his crumbling heart. Instead, Jack smiled at his friend and added a wave, blue magic crystals playing between his fingers. 

Confused, Jamie got up and slowly made his way to the window. His eyes wouldn't stay still, moving from one part of Jack to another, and when the kid did eventually open the window he did it slowly and stood in front of it. 

"Jack?" He sounded uncertain so Jack threw a mini snowball at his face.

"Of course it's me. Who else do you know that knocks on your window, has a staff, and makes magic snow?"

"Frosty the Snowman."

"Hey, he was a broom, not a staff. Gonna let me in?"

"Oh, yeah." Jamie stepped aside, still eying Jack and the spirit couldn't blame him. Jack liked the way he currently looked, but it was a bit different from how he looked the last time he and Jamie had played. 

Jack slipped off the windowsill and into the bedroom. He gave himself a quick tour. It'd been months since he'd spent any personal quality time with Jamie and there were a few differences in the room. A few missing toys, a few new ones. From the corner of his eye, he noticed Jamie watching him but the kid hadn't said anything yet.

Well, if Jamie wasn't going to talk, Jack would.

"So..." Jack turned to face his friend, leaning his cheek against the crook of his staff. "I, um, like to dress up as a girl."

"I can see that."

"Does it bother you?"

Jamie slowly ran his eyes down Jack's body and Jack mentally cataloged the changes he knew Jamie was seeing. Mascara and brown eye shadow. Frost at the edge of his eyes looking like glitter. Lip gloss. Long blonde hair in a thick braid hanging over his shoulder. A woman's peasant top. A fake corset. Fingernails painted navy, toes painted a smokey gray. 

"Not gonna lie, you look a little weird."

Jack gave a small smile, at least Jamie hadn't said it was unnatural or wrong. 

"Can I ask why you're dressed as a girl?"

"I'm not sure I could explain it right." Jack started pacing the room. "At first, it was just something I did for fun. Sneak into department stores at night and try on girls clothes. Then Pippa found me doing it one night -"

"Hold on. Pippa knows?!"

Jack nodded. "And Cupcake. They've been...helping me experiment? They taught me all this stuff about makeup, gave me the wig and clothes."

"Is this why you haven't been around as much? You didn't want me to see?" Jamie sat on his bed and Jack went to join him.

"A little yeah. At first, it was really confusing. Because, well, boys aren't supposed to want to wear make-up or anything like that. But...this makes me happy. It's fun. I feel..." Jack trailed off, not entirely sure what to say. Right? Whole? "I like dressing up and don't mind it that some of my new believers think I'm a girl when I play with them. It feels right, just like this." 

Jack flicked his wrist, causing snowflakes to start falling from the ceiling. Another flick, and a blue magic flake made its way from his fingers to Jamie's nose.

The brunette smiled, but it was a true testament to how unsettling this was that smiling was the only thing Jamie did. No laugh, no wide happy eyes.

"It'll take getting used to, seeing you like this." Jamie waved a hand to incorporate all of Jack sitting on the end of his bed. "But, if you like it, then as your friend I'll support you. It's not like you turned into a girl. You're still Jack Frost. Just, in girl's clothes."

Jack laughed. "Exactly. Thanks for saying that, Jamie. I was worried this might too weird to handle."

* * *

"Miss! Miss! What's your name?"

Jack paused in the middle of a snowball fight with a few kids from Wisconsin. He'd been telling kids he was 'Jack Frost's sister' and that seemed to pacify them. Plus, Jack was quick to come up with a game to lead conversation elsewhere. Now however, he was already in the midst of a game with the kids and as this little girl tugged on the strings of his corset Jack couldn’t spin away to avoid the question.

He couldn't move, period, and got a snowball to the face. 

"Hah! I hit her!"

Jack placed the back of his hand to his forehead. "I'm hit!" he cried as he collapsed backward into the snow.

There were giggles as first the little girl with the question and then the rest of the half a dozen 2nd graders he was playing with came and sat on various parts of his body.

"Miss! What's your name? You never told us."

"I'm Jack Frost's sister, remember?"

"That's what you are. I wanna know your name!"

"Yeah, tell us."

"Please?"

"Tell! Tell!" A crazy kid with Transformers mittens thumped on his shin.

"Elsa," he blurted out. He didn't know where the name came from, he had never even thought about taking a female name, but it rolled off his tongue like ice from his staff. "Elsa Frost."

* * *

Jack took the time to scrub himself clean in a glacier stream before the Guardian meeting. After talking with Pippa, and follow-up conversations with Cupcake and Jamie, Jack was pretty sure the Guardians would be okay with his hobby of looking like a girl. 

No, it was more than a hobby. It was a preference, it was something that was now very much a part him. He had stopped thinking of his get up as 'Elsa gear' awhile ago and they just became his clothes. Just like it became his habit of checking his face in clear ice once in awhile, touching up his makeup and combing the wig. 

And that was the scary part. He liked being Elsa. He responded to the name the kids shouted when he arrived at locations all over the north hemisphere and Jack was pretty sure there were more kids believing in 'Elsa Frost' then 'Jack Frost', though since they were siblings Jack supposed the belief in one helped to power the other...

He shook his head to clear his mind. This wasn't a time to be Elsa, though Elsa at heart was the same as Jack. This was the time to look like his old self because that's what the Guardians expected, that's who the Moon chose, that was the name now listed on all Guardian records. 

Jack Frost was the Guardian, the work persona. Elsa was...his everyday person. His true self.

He looked into the still pool at his face. It felt like ages since he'd seen it without makeup of any kind, or the braided wig on one side of his face. He looked not himself, even as he balanced on one foot and wiggled his painted toes and nails. He looked wrong. 

Jack looked longingly towards the small make-up bag sitting on the ice but resolved to leave it there until after the meeting. Still, he felt he had to do something and so he formed the little frost patterns on the corner of his eyes that Cupcake had said reminded her of glitter. Ice eye shadow of a sort. Seeing it on his face made Jack feel better. 

Now, to get to the Pole before the meeting started without him.

* * *

Jack had heard a bit from the other Guardians about how belief could change a spirit. About how as North's public image grew a jolly belly and white beard, so did he. How Aster's physique took on a more rabbit shape. How the Groundhog suddenly started talking and Tooth's wings turned from those of a bird to those of a dragonfly.

Belief and perceptions drove reality and that thought had totally slipped his mind when 'Elsa Frost' became the dominate winter playmate.

Spring was on the way. April started next week and while the amount of snow in Vancouver wasn't showing that, his desire for a quick, ten-minute nap did. A few more weeks and he'd have to say goodbye to move on to colder climates. 

Except, when he woke up from his nap, Jack realized he shouldn't just move one to colder climates. He should isolate himself in the South Pole. But there was one place to visit first - Pippa's house.

And so the teenager found herself woken up an hour before her school alarm to find a panicking Jack thumping his fist against the glass of her window.

"Elsa?" she asked, sleepily rubbing her eyes as Jack slipped inside.

Jack didn't know if he should wince at that or not. He had told Pippa and Cupcake his new name, and while he hadn't told them to start using 'she' or 'her' they had started calling him Elsa. And now, now-

"Pippa, I've got boobs."

"What?"

"'I've. Got. Boobs." He grabbed Pippa's hands and shoved them on his chest. They weren't huge, but there were definitely soft lumps there. The weight was weird how they hung on his body, it threw off his balance once or twice getting here, and they were large enough to slope the fabric of his shirt.

Pippa's eye widened. There was the panicked, awed, incredulous, WTF look that must have been on his own face hours ago. 

"I changed, down, you know, there too. I'm actually a girl now!"

"Is that a good thing?" Pippa asked, still staring at her hands on Jack's breasts through the shirt. 

"I don't know!" he threw up his hands and walked away to start pacing the room, waving his hands around as he talked. 

"I mean, all spirit changes have been minor, but this is huge!" 

"Well, I was actually asking if you were okay with being female now." Pippa had a hand on her hip and stared at him.

Jack took the time to mull the question over for a few seconds. "You know, I am. I don't mind at all."

He looked down at his body and gave a twirl. He'd have to get used to his new dimensions and shifted center of balance. But already he was more comfortable with his new body than he had been when he woke up. 

"Even though I don't mind, in fact I think if I gave it a day or two I'd love it, this is still really, really unnatural. Spirits don't change this much."

"If it's that strange, shouldn't we tell the Guardians?"

Jack paused. 

They should. He should. He very much should, because this wasn't something he'd be able to scrub off his face and hide. His silhouette was different and his wig was no long that - a sharp tug resulted in constant pain in his skull instead of a brief spurt before the hair detached. The long blonde hair was his now.

"You still haven't told them, have you?"

"No."

"Elsa!"

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

"We've talked about this. They'll still accept you, they won't stop talking to you or anything like that. And you can't say it's cuz you're still scared about not going back, about making this permanent. Because, right now, it is. I doubt you'll wake up tomorrow male."

"No, you're right. It just...I know the Guardians will still accept me. But the Moon? It wasn't Elsa Frost who appeared in the crystal."

"Oh," Pippa threw her arms around him and Jack couldn't resist returning it. After a moment, she pulled back. "Who cares if they resend the Oath. Elsa, we all know that here," she pushed a finger into his chest, "you've always been a Guardian. You looked out for us before North and the others found you, and will continue to do so even if your image is gone from the Workshop's pole."

"Thanks, Pippa. Would you guys come with me to tell them? We have another meeting in two days."

"Of course."

* * *

Unable to fly Cupcake, Pippa, and Jamie to the North Pole together, Jack snuck into the Workshop and stole a snow globe. They spent the hour after school talking and attempting to get homework done in Cupcake's room before Jack shook the glass and tossed it at the wall. A portal appeared in typical fashion, a bright swirl of white light, and Jack found himself stepping through the portal last.

By the time the white had faded into the soft brown of North's place, the kids were already receiving surprised greetings. Greetings that instantly stopped as they stared at Jack in disbelief.

"Um, hi?" he said, nervously running his fingers over the point of his staff where it started to curve backward. 

"Jack?" Tooth asked, flying a few feet closer.

"Elsa." Cupcake answered for him, reaching a hand back to pull him forward. "Jack's been going by Elsa for two months now."

"What?" Bunny sputtered. "No way. He hasn't been showing up like this to meetings. " Bunny waved a paw in Jack's direction. "And he hasn't said anything about it either."

They all looked at Jack, who had opened his mouth to respond but found he couldn't say a word. Feeling helpless, he shut his mouth and turned a pleading look to the teenagers in front of him. Jamie gave him an encouraging smile, Pippa gestured a bit impatiently towards the other Guardians, and Cupcake decided to give him a none to gentle poke to the side. 

"Jack?" Tooth prodded after still he did nothing.

With a sigh, he turned his gaze from the kids to the spirits. Bunny still looked upset and halfway expecting this to be a joke, arms crossed and brow furrowed. Sandy floated silently, giving him a blank look. North simply looked sad, and more than that a little hurt. Tooth, on the other hand, looked as if she had an epiphany. 

She flew forward and took Jack's hand, tracing her fingers over his painted fingernails. "Sophie hasn't ever painted your nails, has she?"

"No," Jack kept his eyes on their hands. "Cupcake and Pippa did it at first, but then I learned. And it's more than that. I wear makeup, and like dresses, and used to wear a wig."

"Why did you not say before, Jack?" North took a few steps forward, arms out in a pleading gesture.

"Elsa," Cupcake reminded them all.

North ignored her. "Is...unusual habit, yes, but we all have them. Me, I like to do handstand before carving ice."

Jack couldn't help but give half a smile at that, the image so ridiculous. 

"I didn't say anything for, for a couple of reasons." Pippa gently nudged his side while Cupcake gave a more vicious jab. Jack gave them a glare before continuing. "I didn't know what you'd think. And then when I realized you'd be okay with it, I didn't know if it would affect my official status as a Guardian - the Moon did pick Jack Frost after all. And...and I knew talking about it would make this more real and not just a hobby. It made things seem...permanent and I wasn't sure I was ready for that."

The teens all crowded around him, pressed against his side in silent support and Tooth couldn't resist in flinging her arms around his neck. Jack returned the hug and felt the instant Tooth stiffened.

"So why tell us now?" Bunny asked. "You've been putting this off for awhile, judging by how often you've had that shirt."

Jack looked up at him, redirecting his gaze to North's boots. Tooth already knew, but it seemed like she was too shocked to say anything. Gently, Jack peeled her off and took a step forward. 

"Because," he placed his hands at level with his arm pits and then brushed them down through the air as he cocked a hip. "Elsa Frost is not just a female name for a boy spirit anymore. I'm, um, totally female." 

He looked from one Guardian to another and took more delight in their shocked faces then he probably should have. Jamie, Pippa, and Cupcake all snickered. 

Sandy seemed to recover first, if the feminine shape above his head counted as such. It seemed like he wanted confirmation, so Jack nodded and then to make it more obvious - though Bunny and North were totally glancing at his chest and trying to be sneaky about it - Jack pulled the shirt taunt in the back and turned to show Sandy his side profile. He knew exactly what they would see - two small lumps on his chest, just above the fake corset he was wearing. 

"Are those real?!" Bunny asked.

"Yes," Pippa, Jamie, and Tooth all answered at the same time, a blush on each of their cheeks. 

"Is this...normal?" Jack released the shirt, allowing it to loosen but he could tell there were still eyes noticing the breasts there. "Changing so much, I mean."

Sandy wiggled his hand horizontally, which Jack took to mean no, but it's been known to happen.

"Change happens, this is true." North stroked his chin with a thumb and forefinger. "But for this change to happen, your story must have changed greatly."

"You've been playing with the children as Elsa, haven't you?" Tooth asked. Like North had before, she looked a little sad. "All winter, they've been thinking they've been playing with a girl instead of boy. It's the only thing that makes sense. I don't know if you introduced yourself that way, or if they assumed and you just went allow with it, but..oh Jack! Elsa! Oh that will get confusing," Tooth mumbled to herself before she continued, staring at Jack the whole time.

"I feel awful. You went through all that, a changing story and identity, and we didn't even notice!"

"Hey!" Cupcake protested. "Jack didn't change into Elsa, he's been Elsa the entire time! He didn't change into a new person, body modification aside. He's still the same. He just finally acted out on his desires. This wasn't something new that started this fall you know."

"Yeah, if I hadn't caught him in the girl's dressing room, and he said he'd been doing that for years, he still would have wanted to wear girls clothing and makeup. We just helped satisfy his curiosity." Pippa finished with a 'hmph', daring the Guardians to say anything else.

Jack noticed their eyes stray to Jamie and the boy threw his hands up in a wasn't me gesture. Which was true, Jamie hadn't actually helped Jack with his twisted feelings and desires, but he had accepted them and that made all the difference to Jack.

"Actually, now that, you know," Pippa waved a hand up and down Jack's body, "We should probably stop using masculine pronouns for you. No going back now that you have boobs."

Jack looked down at his chest. 

"Unless, you want to change back."

"No...what Cupcake said before was right." Jack - no, he was Elsa now and she really should get used to addressing herself properly in her head - smiled at the brunette girl. "This feels right. Elsa is who I'm meant to be."

"In that case, I am sorry you did not feel comfortable telling us about this before."

Elsa whirled to stare at North. "No, no, it's my fault! I should have told you guys, it was just all my silly fears -"

"We've been friends now for many years now. If you felt more comfortable telling these children then us, we have been doing something wrong."

"Yeah, sorry about that mate. I mean, sheila."

"No, really, I mean. You guys gave me opportunities, Tooth you noticed my nails, and it's just me, just my fault that -"

"Elsa, stop." Tooth held up a hand and flew into her space. "Just stop. You do this all time. Not everything is your fault you know. You have to stop taking on more blame than you need to. It's not your fault you didn't tell us. Like North said, it's ours."

Elsa could see Sandy nodding vigorously over Tooth's shoulder. 

"And because it's our fault, let us make it up to you." Bunny hopped closer. 

"But there's nothing to make up. There's nothing wrong now that you have to fix."

"There is. You don't trust us enough to come to us with this, and maybe that is because you are not knowing enough of us. Just like we didn't know a lot about you. Come, let us talk. Share stories." North wrapped an arm over Elsa's shoulders.

"Us too?" Jamie asked, looking up at North.

North looked between Elsa and Jamie, flickering his gaze to Cupcake and Pippa as well. "Of course, you helped Elsa when we did not. Consider story time a reward."

"Awesome."

Pippa rolled her eyes at Jamie, then grabbed Elsa's hand to lead her to a couch. "Come on, I want to start by telling them how I found you in that dressing room. And then we should tell them about when we scared Jamie a few days after Halloween."

"Wait, that was you guys?! I can't believe it!"

* * *

"Close your eyes!" Cupcake demanded as soon as Elsa landed in her bedroom. 

"Um, okay." Elsa quickly shut her eyes, and then for good measure covered them with her palms, allowing her staff to fall into the crook of her elbow. "Why am I covering my eyes?"

"Because I said so."

There was the sound of a door opening, of swishing fabric, and then she heard Pippa say "You can look now."

Elsa opened her eyes to see Pippa holding a beautiful dress. It had long white sleeves, but turned a pale blue at the bodice and continued to darken as the fabric stretched towards the ground. There were crystals on the sleeves and along the chest. 

"I've kept my eye on this since September when I saw you try it on," Pippa began. "I kept hiding it on the floor and waiting for the price to go down, but here it is! Don't know if it'll fit you, now that, well, you're a girl, but no harm in trying right?"

"Pippa, you're amazing!" Elsa swept forward and wrapped Pippa into a hug, the dress smooshed between them. Once the redhead had the life squeezed out of her, Elsa gave Cupcake a similar treatment. 

"Go ahead," Cupcake said with a laugh, "Try it on."

Elsa stripped out of her top and pants, shooting Pippa a glare when she commented on Elsa's bra. Gone was the body shyness that came with a guy trying to wear woman's clothes, as well as the shyness of undressing in front of female friends. It had taken time, but she was very happy Pippa and Cupcake had what they termed 'a naked party' to instruct him in the ways of a female figure. Of how each body type was different, but also normal. Tooth had wanted to help, but being covered in feathers made it difficult. 

The dress did sit differently on her body then it had before, fit better. Loose areas where now tight and tight areas were looser. Elsa gave a twirl in the dress, smiling largely while Cupcake and Pippa oohed and ahhed.

"I'm glad it fits. It looks great on you Elsa."

"Thanks, Pippa. There's only one thing I have to test before I can consider it perfect."

"Oh?" Cupcake asked.

"Can I build a snowman in this?"

**Author's Note:**

>  **Where this came from, pt 2:** While the comic strip inspiration wasn't really a trans!pepper comic, it has been read as one and it got the juices flowing. I love both Elsa and Jack, want to link them, but haven't figured out away to do so that leaves much of the canon untouched (though I tried in [Generations](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1342816)). Turning Jack into Elsa was another way to connect them (or Elsa into Jack, as where [my sister's mind went](http://uniasus.tumblr.com/post/105340983743/storing-plotbunny-texts-for-easy-find-later-cuz-my) and that fic will most likely also be written). 
> 
> While the idea of turning them from one into the other seems silly to me, because my personal canonical understanding of them has neither of them willing to consider this (like I said, I like to play with canon as little as possible in crossovers), I know that for people who have gone through the gender switch process it can be confusing, huge, and a whole mess of emotional and relationship drama. I hope this fic did not make light of your struggles if you went through it, that wasn't the intention, and I honestly tried to keep Jack's emotions realistic (though I will admit I do not know anyone who has gone through the process). When the reverse - Elsa into Jack - is written, I will be doing it from a similar mindset.


End file.
